Thangka You

I’m very taken with Thangka art.

Ten years ago upon my first visit to India, I explored the sacred art in and around temples, the fresco’s, carvings and statues. Visiting Dharamsala where many Tibetans in exlile reside, brought with them, artworks, crafts, culture and traditions of worship: I discovered Thangka paintings. I had originally wished to study and learn to make them too, as well as being mesmerized by mandala art.

Five years later I visited Nepal. In Kathmandu there were many shops filled with traditional Tibetan culture, and I bought a couple of callenders I wished to draw inspiration from.

Finally after five years of teaching myself to express myself through line art, I still have those callenders and finally found the right space. The journey makes more sense, creating my own language through symbolism, my creative pursuits of combining the physical and spiritual experience in art, I’m really happy to ever explore more…a work in progress…

My first thangka doodle

Treasure

My feet in the surf I looked up to see the stars, amazing last night, but I scanned the sky to realize the moon was nowhere. Then I saw a light on the horizon, rising, it was the moon so big!

This I created yesterday, Treasure, I was at a mental health community meeting, and I thought of the power of words, and most especially, self talk.

And today, my last day with Bella!

Candy for the Soul?!

Delighted, buzzing and on a high from live painting last night, to Soul Candy’s demo release party. Loved the energy, danced, grooved and finger painted to it, here is a quick 30 min dash of candy!

The band rocking out.

Then we watched the demo release on the side of a building.

Sandy feet from the beach, Bella tying me up as I song write in some shade.

Stopping off at Heaven, witnessing band practice and seeing a fellow Visionary Artist…she has this crazy pop up sketchbook, heehee.

Existential Crisis

My moon time brought an existential crisis (yes tears happened) and so I doodled in therapy and I like what came out. ‘How about the Universe?’ are part lyrics from a song I’m currently writing.

But, like…what’s the point though?…

I LOVE this design!

My set up at Gatosano pop up market.

…a little closer…

I was invited to live paint, here’s my set up, adjacent, facing the beach.

My work in progress before the sun set.

I’m Seeing Stars

This is me explaining how I don’t know how to pose…at The Trip 66 Market.

And Bella also came to market and made a lot of friends.

I thought I had a photo of this one, created recently…it found a new home – I’m Seeing Stars!

Beach Bella

Day one of dog sitting Bella. Well last night she tried to eat my pencil.
This morning I let her off her leash at the beach and oooh! – she ran off, she had a wonderful time playing this game with me while I trudged after her… but she followed a woman down the beach and it was rather embarrassing that I had no control over this dog I’d let loose.

Anyway she’s gorgeous and I love having her!

And then a fair question…’Are You Weird’?

Cosmic Love

Cosmic Love, a heart beating for the Universe through Monty’s chest.

Tonight is a Full Moon, to me it looks like a yinyang, one side red, the other blue. Later it changed to red and yellow.

And now I’m going to Doodle Dump some finished pieces I’d had in pencil for a a day or two. Very welcome to download and colour any designs, or comment what they mean to you.

Soul

I had a home day today. I mainly did a lot of singing, a little songwriting, and of course, doodling. This one is very…vulvic.

I was thinking about a design I did yesterday for the tattoo, this one is a little different, but I love the feeling I get from it.

I originally bought these overalls for less than a dollar, to cut up and turn into harem pants, but instead I’ve turned a liking to them as they are. Earlier I covered the below the knee area in ‘Possibilities’ stamps!

Puppy Dog Gaze

Yesterday I began drawing this cat, influenced by a cat eye I painted recently, now in my room peering at me from behind two plants.

I also drew some shrooboodicks.

This morning I freestyled this witchy woman, what do you see?

I then went for coffee and met a gorgeous little puppy, with really coarse cream fur. When I petted her under the chin, it made her back leg go off like a tummy scratch does. I captured her adorable puppy dog gaze.

Really excited and happy about starting to tattoo again with a gun – piew piew – a doodle on the skin, a work in progress…thanks Monty for posing.

People Hugging

This morning I said goodbye to a couple of friends, and in parting i doodled a camera, why not?

Last night in my Dreamatorium I did a lot of drawings. The first was of chakras, each circle becoming bigger and more dense as it goes down.

I thought about what it would feel like to be connected to the universe, as it, and I thought about how the universe is inside me, therefore I am inside me, and inside myself, so I gave myself an inside cuddle.

Next I drew the concept of nourishing ones inner world first, to then receive from the outside world a reflection of that.

I enjoy the people hugging; she is being held by him, so she is hugging him back, but then I see she is supporting him, and he is supporting her…

Fantasy Land

I have a new rug from a friend, I’d have gone with purple but this plushy pink is winning me over! Thinking of my fantasy novel, for the last couple of days I’ve been sat on this rug in front of my balcony having coffee parties for one, taking in the sun, doodling freely, thinking of this fantasy world I’m building…

I went to a Sunday brunch popup market and did some usual sticker bombing.

A girl decided to spend some time next to Colin, holding a small purple guitar, it felt as if she was dreaming to play!

Wet Room

I felt like my bathroom wasn’t getting enough colour, and I was trying to think of what ‘art’ might work in a wet room.

I’ve been drawing a lot, but they’re still in (light) pencil so don’t photograph well. I’ve been putting attention towards my fantasy novel, and drawing inspiration from it. I’ll include them when they’re inked!

Waves That Move

This morning I decided to switch it up to my A3 pad and intuitively created this piece. In the diamond it says The Waves That Move Her, and below it reads The Waves Moved By Her. I’m really interested to know what you see in this piece!

Art Class!! Making Faces!

Set Up

I spent this morning chopping up and stitching the seams of a large rug today…so that’s creative…otherwise I finish my day at Crazy Cats Crazy Market.

With some free Arts to enjoy: materials and designs to colour!

And here’s my set up:

Under Water Bubbles

Oh my, today I’ve been sick, it was slowly coming on. I contemplated on the root of it, not just because I wasn’t wearing socks when it’s cold, but also because I want to spend more time at home, to restore balance that has been thrown off from a good dose of extroversion and not enough meditation. I ended up spending the day with my good friend and neighbor…who was finger painting.

Finger Snails

I tried drawing her caricature while she was painting…

I tried again in a different style, from this photo…there’s agreement that it was a swing and a miss….then I doodled a little more…

This design I made a few days ago and painted today. It’s a flower under the stars, or are stars coming off it?… but it sways as if under water, giving off bubbles.

Turned to Noodles

I am brain dead and body dead…today I spent my afternoon in natural Hot Springs Park outside DaNang…this was the before photo, full of pep…after we were like sleepy zombies!

As I feel like noodle soup, I haven’t done any new pieces today…yet! But I did finish some precious pieces off with colour!

Worlds an Apple.
This one, started as a nose, ended up as a face-person-bird and I like it!
When I returned to a more meaty diet, I get so lethargic on a plant based diet!

To Be Human

Last night I performed at Crazy Cats Sunday open mic, hosted by Colin, jamming up the dance floor…you go Monty’s, shake it!

Nice hat Monty, where did you get it?

Last night I drew a ‘rude!’ design, a little graphic, so I’m hesitant to post it here, however an elderly Vietnamese man came by and looked at the design while I was inking it this morning, he gave an increasingly widening smile and then a thumbs up!

This mornings piece: What Is It To Be Human? I suppose the question I’m ever searching and exploring.

I finished the piece from yesterday…clouds!

Life Goals

The moon last night, an energy worth capturing.

Thinking about surrender, what that means, what that looks like, what that feels like. What is both human and sacred. I should really title this design ‘Life Goals: To Be This Relaxed’!

It’s a work in progress, and I love every step of the process, finding completion in each. The expression and nuance that a pencil brings. The definition, stark contrast and play on negative space the line art brings, making my imagination fill spaces between lines with colour, depth, perspective. Adding colour, I’m like a kid coloring in, taking each painting as an experiment to explore, what could be a thousand colours, grounding possibilities, committing to colours.

On the beach today, spent time contemplating, feeling connected with nature and began writing for songs…

Dancing

Friends in a tub! On a rooftop in DaNang a group of us mused over this fabulous tub.

Lurking on the sidelines, from the street at an open faced bar, watching this Vietnamese band rock out hard. Really enjoyed my lurk.

Obsessed with the face I made. To me, the earlobes as testicles, the head a penis, spewing out baby planets, and the aura around…a ‘hippy dick head’.

I drew this one while dancing! The eye is an eye, a microphone, an umbilical chord with a fetus.

It started as a face and ended as a face bird.

And today, a second wedding, so beautiful, it moves most of the audience to tears! I was all wet in the upper face region.

Capturing masculine and feminine energy dancing together…love, music, dancing, laughing…

Bad bitches in da back! Bus ride to the beach!

Photo shoot and chill #beachlife

Spaces Faces

I have a new tattoo machine! This pen is so freeing to use, bossin’ up my line work! Practicing on latex this morning, but super looking forward to creating permanent doodles on skin!

Playing around, I love space, and watercolour is such a fun medium for it. I love working with layers also. Here I’m putting down liquid latex for stars, water and pigmentation, followed by sketch and inking, painting some more…

I spent some time in the afternoon working on designing a template for spray painting. Not sure if I’ve done it right but keen to find out!

Cat Face Electric Guitar

Last night at The Trip 66 open mic, they had no plug in so I could play my beats, so I put a microphone to my iPad…oh the treble! I felt like I crashed and burned, but after all, that’s what open mic is for. As it’s my first time on the Trip stage, the only way from here is up.

I’m very into the doodles I got into! Especially the cat-face-electric-guitar!

And I ended my Friday with kids art class! Was a lot of fun! Teaching expression through eyes.

We’re In Heaven

Last night at Heaven Bar, it was open mic and I rocked some original Hip Hop tunes of mine. Enjoyed as always, by me and a little praise from the audience always feels soooo good! It’s my uplifting raps about constructive self expression and creativity that do the best. Here is my doodle We’re In Heaven’. I was feeling good, feeling connected, in a bundle of familiar and friendly faces. And second ‘I’m A Rabbit On A Carrot’. Why? Because…

…something like ‘do you pick up energetically while making these designs? ‘Cos I’m resonating so much with the symbolism in this pic!’. Nice!

Are you a Bánh Mì?! Vietnamese sandwich, famous throughout the land. Monty is, my late lunch, delicious! Chilly please!

Getting my paint on at Crazy Cats Bar, I originally was going to make it black and white, but I felt it wasn’t popping and I’m enjoying this colour adventure! So,w UV paints in there, hoping the bar lights reach this piece…over at the back under the dart board.

Connected

So I took things a little further, I’ve had such a great time with this! Connecting the pictures like this gives me a whole different way to play and I really enjoy doing line work…

…and then I colour it in!

I feel like the black lines in the background I’m now drawing are representing energy grids, how everything is connected…just like these pictures.

Create Worlds

Woke up this morning to questions on my art…’I’ll take 3!’ Well that helps me get out of bed! Popped to my favorite coffee jam as usual and I watched my friend cover her laptop in my stickers, an additional layer to layers of stickers. She proclaims she never buys art, as a minimalist, so this is a big compliment, thank you! ‘When you make it big I want to say I have originals.’

This Cyclopes in the Mountains is one of my absolute favorites!

This designed poured from me; two faces together, also making a face, and a dog on top. for whatever reason, what do you feel it means, represents for you?

In the afternoon I stopped by a plant nursery, where the most lovable dog lives. Picked up some pots for potting.

A friend has suggested I create worlds around my characters, and it’s been ever on my mind lately. What kind of story do you feel this one is telling? I feel it needs a colour!

Feteye

Today was interesting, it began with a short cycle to Section 30.

I made acquaintances with a man who, before leaving brunch, suddenly delve into an epic tale of world record holding adventure. Cycling the globe and filming his way through one of the hottest place on earth, as first to cycle Danakil Depression, in Ethiopia. As a small group of us talked, we never quite got round to our game of Jenga.

I was inspired to create these two designs, an I am falling absolutely in love with this new variation of design, of a balled up fetus with an eye. I call it ‘feteye’. This second design I’m loving! I haven finished marking it in..but I will!

Only Joking

Last night was the joint celebration of two birthdays, that began with an open stage. I performed some raps that went down well. A comedian took the stage and told a long joke about a blow job, impersonating a redneck, but actually I didn’t get the joke, but did enjoy the doodle!

It felt like a stage full of performers and I, a single audience member, which tickled me. These folks enjoying a good sing along! Birthday boy on the left, Happy Birthday Chris!

I love Saxophone! I personally find Saxophone and Violin the two most exciting instruments, ooh they tickle me! My friend revealed he’d brought his to the party, and seeing my excitement, got it out just for me, hopefully I’ll see him perform soon!

Meanwhile on the spaceship…

…I mean, karaoke bar, Birthday girl on the left, Happy Birthday Linh!

I noticed my UV paint showed up well in the karaoke place – toilet photography, loving it!

In My Hand

Last night I went to the soft opening of The Craic House, a new bar and arts space. They did a cool thing, pain a mug and get a discount on beer! Hours of doodling madness. I painted my own and contributed to a communal mug.

Here are a bunch of mugs, chilling on the mug wall, ready to be cooked!

I can’t wait to fill it with different liquids and see the design change colour!

And then this candid photo…

Today it’s raining and I nursed my hangover over coffee in my usual spot and embarked on my daily doodle adventure…and I’ve noticed an increased interest in drawing hands lately. I love hands, I just love having hands and all the magic they can do, my life tentacles!

And finally, Art Class in the evening, today looking at expression of emotions with eyes. Ahh this made me chuckle a lot!

Loving Curves

Yesterday evening, a business social in a really cool new cafe, but the lights gave me a hella headache. Now I get why I loved hoodies as a youth, the hood is really protective for an Empath. My new boss had fancy looking cake while I hid under my hood, yet somehow we laughed a lot.

On an errand…aren’t you errand I didn’t say banana?

Buying wall pegs from a frame store, I was taken in by colours…so was Monty, literally.

On my way home, a fairly typical motorbike stack! Um Monty!

Topping off with a freestyle. I find drawing with a marker very soothing and therapeutic, I’m interested to explore with lines more. What does this image invoke or inspire in you? I love her curves.

A Free World Dreaming

This dog isn’t friends with just anybody, including me. Daily at my coffee spot, I give my hand to sniff, met with little interest, in the hopes I can at least build familiarity. Today both of us sat by the rain. Many dogs are wearing jackets this season in DaNang.

A short while later…friendly to few meets friendly to everyone, and Monty stuck in the middle. Don’t worry Monty, it’s just puppy play.

Starting to see what I mean about doggie fashion? It’s the cutest! Talking we ended on the subject of working for passion and the annoyance of involving money, if only life were set up so that we could all work from passion, this world would transform incredibly! It was so lovely to hear, to know, the passion in her work: Mamma J’s fyi

Lunch, am I right Vietnam?! Knees to the table!

Dreaming of a world where we live by passion, the things humanity is capable of, we have the resources in abundance to make this world free and beautiful! Dreaming of a time when people don’t say ‘that’s just how it is’ as a reason not to make life magical. ‘The World doesn’t work that way’, as dreamers ask profusely ‘why not?!’

Wow, after I wrote and drew this, I saw this on the wall. I’ve technically seen it before, but never actually read or took notice of it, but I did today. It’s clear how frequencies vibe.

Lazy Sofa Day

Instant coffee my landlord gifted me for Christmas.

A very chill day at home, but here I did finish watercolouring some designs.

Cross Cross Unicornus

This design was from Christmas evening, chilling down from Christmas Eve party, chilling on a rooftop, a friend wearing a bunny eared hood and marvelous plushy Unicorn slippers 🦄

Not sure who I’m photo crediting, but it’s a really cute shot! Merry Christmas!

Sacred Goddess Flow

Sunday’s at Crazy Cats is open mic, hosted by Andrew Goode and last night I hit it. It had been a while but I practiced my scales and sewed a plushy penis into my trousers, so that when I performed my rap about being a bi-gender Drag King ‘Call Me Daddy’, in the last verse I could whip it out, and whip it out I did. I mused over whether or not it would be the right crowd, but in the end I performed the song again later in the night by audience request – boyoyoyng!

I met some FaceConscious Fans! I was FanConscious! Oh it made me so happy!

‘We didn’t expect you to be so friendly’. I get that a lot. Everybody gets a sticker!

This was so much fun! I was having a conversation, being told about how panorama function on the phone can make cool doppelgänger effects, while a third person didn’t understand so we were shown!

Photo and creativity credit: Ian Dudzinski

Today is slow, mildly hungover I do my usual routine of breakfast, coffee shop, and here for lunch in a vegan restaurant named Annen, with a gorgeous garden, the tofu ratatouille is delicious! (I came back for dinner!)

This morning I began my ‘Goddess Flow’ let’s call it. It’s a sacred time I feel, as I meditate more, I connect more with the reverence and cleaning time of my period, and feel honoured to be so connected; to the female collective of the world, to this amazing planet. When I am in this time, whatever emotions I have are heightened. If something bothers me, it come to the surface and bothers me ten fold. I understand why I felt mentally tired yesterday, but today, I feel happy, connected and optimistic…thought a goodnight out performing and connecting with others always makes me feel so good!

Oh haha, I found a Monty shaped puddle!

Spend the afternoon adding colours to the bathroom mural at Flavoury, and thinking about where I might paint next…

Lost My Head

I’m Phở-miliar with this Hanoian dish. My friend and I last night when we met for a Plaza Grand Opening, but turns out the free wine was 8.30AM and not PM as we though, surprising.

I did cycle past this hotel lobby on the way and Monty couldn’t resist a photo op!

I had a super lazy Sunday, up after lunch and went to my usual coffee spot which was busy, so I took up this spot outside.

I started a bathroom mural yesterday at Flavoury, and today filled in fluorescent UV orange.

I decided to have some fun and play some table football there, a bit rusty I jokingly blamed the headless goalie for not paying attention, haha. 

Crazy Cats is another bathroom I’ve been painting, so I popped over to continue doodling a little, freestyle on the walls! My Eyeginas and Monty’s! Still a work in progress but being in this toilet is like being inside an Art installation!

Piss Spot

This is my breakfast most mornings lately. It’s a street stall outside a family home, on the same street that I live. I discovered it one day and made my way through the menu before settling on Bánh Ướt as my top pick. Scissor cut rice sheets, pork floss and…mystery meat? salad and fish sauce. It’s delicious and slides down so easily.

I’m often served by the mother but always greeted so warmly every time I come by mum, grandma and grandpa, kids as well if it’s the weekend or I’m early enough before school! The grandparents and I don’t share much language in common but that doesn’t stop us from talking to one another and exchanging pleasantries and well wishes we don’t understand, but understand.

Rolling up to my second usual morning spot, Flavoury Cafe, a trendy spot where my artwork hangs and hip hop plays, I see some road works I couldn’t miss right outside. I showed the worker my photo and he beamed me a massive smile!

A friend popped in to drop off some laminated stickers she’d tried out printing for me (thank you!!) our convo meandered though motherhood, tattooing and ended with street art. She told how her partner likes to tag, and she called it pissing like a dog, piss spot, marking territory…and I find this visual hilarious! (Apologies, I have a new pen today, it’s thicker; I had intended the gentle area to be a more delicate star).

I found it so funny I showed the guys who works a Bánh mì stall out of the cafe. Me mused over my designs then asked to draw his own. He reveals he has a street crew named Funky Boyz – dope! This will be a collaborated art piece when I’m done with it!

Abundance

So Happy New Year everybody!

How did you spend yours?

I saw the parties, I imagined the crowds, but I didn’t want to be there. I wanted a low key time to relax, I wanted to spend it with someone who would be present with me, who’s company I really wanted and who wanted mine. I spent New Years with myself, snuggled up on the couch watching movies and a minute before midnight I got into bed and began a short meditation, from 11.59pm, opening my eyes at 00.04 in the new year.

My morning cycle across town to meet a friend and Monty’s excitement over the sharing of Tiramisu in a funky, modern Viet owned Cafe. Then my friend introduced me to Mỳ Quảng noodle, a famous dish of the Quảng Nam province within which Danang exists. Wow these noodles are delicious! (after my friend left I had another bowl 😉

Waiting for the art store to open after its daily lunch break, and getting some painting in, in an adjacent coffee shop, I captured some enthusiasm for my stickers:

Closer to dusk I joined a share circle where we each though of something we wanted guidance for, then took a tangerine with a word already written, as an answer for our contemplation. I picked ‘determination’. As the year of the Ox begins, and myself being an Ox, I know some Ox traits to be hard working and stubborn, which in me translate to determination. That I have found in my FaceConscious project; I am determined, I keep going, and I have faith that I am on the right path for me, however winding this explorative road.

Another girl picked out the fruit I had intended to take had I been offered the plate before her; it read ‘abundance’ and was the question to my answer. When she shared she said the word slowly, and I heard A-bun-dance!

Sisterhood Unite

Happy Women’s Day in Vietnam!

I wrote this song a little while ago but felt to share it today.

‘Sisterhood Unite’

We are moon creatures
we reflect sunlight
Intuitively we feel the rays,
And flow them like the tide

We take the light
into voids and darkness
Emotional like water
We create the waves

(chorus)
We are wild, we are fierce, we are holding great life
We make the energy flow and in the darkness we bring light

Like the mermaid who lost her voice
When she left the sea
we too have lost our voices,
split from one another

we must come back together again,
and chant again as one,
pulsate vibe and flow in our
everlasting dance

(chorus)

we are all in need of the same love
We must heal our collective wounds
connection and in unity
again access nature’s womb

Allow each other to speak,
unblock all of our frights,
begin to flow and let go,
fly into the nights

(chorus)

Where there is woman, there is life’s connection,
and a need to go deeper
she must be reminded of who she really is
she’s everybody’s sister

hold one another, hug,
comfort and dance,
be one another’s sister, mother,
daughter and friend

(bridge)
Sisters, mothers, daughters,
confidants unite,
embrace and flow together,
and dance into the night

(chorus)

Sync up again and
we will gain back our power.
We were never meant to be alone
this has been our downfall,

we must come back together again
as much as we can,
take back our sisterhood
And hold each others hand

(bridge)
(chorus)

The burden and pain of segregation
Don’t condemn another woman’s aggravation
We all feel the same disconnection
Love everyone with equal affection

The burden and pain of segregation
Don’t condemn another woman’s aggravation
We all feel the same disconnection
Love everyone with equal affection
Everyone with equal affection

(bridge)
(chorus)

Omen To Apocalypse

This is my Christmas song.

How infuriated I was when I was younger, at the mindless shopping and wasteful packaging, wrapping paper, cards and bags that were destined for landfill, and the unconscious presents bought in obligation. I was particularly angered during a recession, when people were struggling. Our government was telling us to shop shop shop, for the sake of our economy, that wasn’t serving us, wasn’t serving our planet, but us serving it, in a completely shortsighted way, and asked to put aside our true values, in order to feed the machine that destroys our planet and leads us into unconscious behavior. Where are our priorities? Isn’t Christmas about coming together, about family, connecting and rejoicing in the life we have?…as we sit around a pile of trash with unneeded products stacked up on our laps.

It has been years since I experienced a family Christmas, and the receiving and giving of gifts is now something that only occurs naturally in my life now, few and far between, but always with energy and care. I still had some residual anguish I needed to express over this. I began writing this poem Christmas Eve 2018, as I went to bed, and finished writing it Christmas morning.

I’m not an activist for the environment per se, but I still fight in my own way. For me it’s more about everything having a knock on effect, my feelings are strong over all kinds of repression, including the repression of our planet to thrive the way nature, and all she supports, should. I know that it begins with us connecting to our heart, to what really matters in life and not what we’re told, and so I hope that the vibration I put out, touches where it needs to and I strive to do the best I can. I care deeply for nature, and to write this, I pause, as it brings tears to my eyes.

I once was asked to describe my poem, this piece and this is what I wrote:
‘A hip hop poem warning of the dire consequences of our present global unconscious state regarding corruption, waste and insensitivity towards the needs of our souls. Living in ignorance of the destruction of our planet, which, if unmanaged, could lead to the demise of the human race.’

‘Omen To Apocalypse’

Our food should be medicine, instead it’s poison
Fresh air should be abundant, instead it’s all gone
Our ocean and rivers, should be full of wildlife
But now they are depleted, death by fish knife
The trees they are chocking, while human beings are smoking
Activists warn us, but we act like they are joking
The land it is eroding, lowlands are now flooding
The garden of Eden, has closed down for extra parking
Species disappearing, while Forrest are being clearing
Distraction otherwise, at entertainment we are cheering
Drinking plastic bottles, laced with hormones
Then off it goes to landfill, earth cancer by the tones
The butterflies are dying, the bees no longer flying
Flowers are gone, everything’s wrong, politicians help by lying
Nature is secondary to short term dead desire
Caught in the rat race, our souls looking for a buyer
There’s no consideration, By any corporation,
Profit margins trump, the survival of every nation
The notion of a person, has been eradicated
Slaves to our flesh puppets, our souls completely jaded
Is this the path you choose, blinded by nonsense
While we destroy nature, for an extra fifty cents
And what will you buy, when the food is all diminished
And who will you impress, when your neighbours are all finished
Is this the life you chose, to live like a walking corpse
Using substance and distraction, until all feelings warps
And when we’re all dead, twitching in our graves
I bet we will regret, that to money we were slaves
The biggest joke of all, is that we know it’s all a lie
And yet we do not stop, self ruin till we die
But at least there is one thing, we can surely give back
Once we’re done killing, and can no longer attack
Rolling in the earth, underneath us they will squirm
Nature will rise again, as we’re eaten by her worm
We’ll be eaten by her worm
We’ll be eaten by her worm
What will you live on, when the money’s all gone
And the oppression has won, and we’re beaten by the Dawn
Who’s side will you be on, when you know that this is wrong
Pollution and corruption, killing off the birds song
We’re all going to die, so don’t listen to the lie
To just blindly buy, while we hear our planet cry
Of consumerism, we’re all in a prison
Destruction has risen, and freedom is forbidden
We’re not infallible, and nature is valuable
Stop acting like a cannibal, prioritising capital
Give nature your respect, ‘cos we’re not done breathing yet
Stop throwing the net, and release the tourniquet
We can turn this world around, help steer this blind crowd
Point out the dark cloud, and raise your voice loud
The end is not nigh, if with our planet we ally
Open every eye, before it’s too late and we all die

If I were a Dancing Tree

Yesterday I took part in a workshop on body movement.
We began in meditation, drinking sweet herbal tea and sharing how we feel about our bodies…and then we danced. I danced mostly with my eyes closed and after a while, I began to feel as if I was dancing with the energies around my body. As a lofty person, I am used to taking energy in from above, but in this grounded dance, I felt like I was sucking energy up my legs, other energy I danced with which I pulled down, and with both movements, I was powering my core. I felt like I was dancing like Tai Chi, swaying energy around me, dancing with energy as my dance partner, and pulling more and more energy up my roots; yes I felt like a dancing tree.

After some time I sat on the floor and continued to dance with my upper body, I felt like I was bringing energy into my body, holding my inner space, just for me, and when I stood up again, my body felt so open, all my movements were open, shoulders back, heart strained open. And when my body tired, I sat among the dancers and drew how I felt in the beginning, as I wanted to share my experience, my dancing journey.

This was at Art Campus in DaNang
Free Body Movement with Mar García
Photo credit: Anna Dyachenko

I’mperfection

Perfectionism is something that used to hold me back, and sometimes still does, however, it took me a long time to realize this. As I never saw anything I did as perfect, I couldn’t recognize myself as a perfectionist. While for some, perfectionism may manifest by one striving to be the best or striving to be perfect in the things they do, but me, it manifested in preventing me from even starting. I held myself back because I held myself to an impossible standard I never imagined achieving, for pared with my low self esteem, I blocked myself from so many things.

Along my journey I discovered that I wished to create every day of my life, that it was the kind of life that would not only bring me immense joy to live, but without living such a life, would feel like life a wasted. As I needed art so badly, yes, needed and will always need, I realized I had to commit to imperfection. When I began this project over 4 years ago, I knew I couldn’t tell myself to paint every day, as while depressed, it felt like an impossible task, but I could commit to drawing an imperfect line doodle of a face, that reflected how I felt in the moment, and so I did. I thought I would get better at drawing people, at drawing expressions and realism as the pursuit of drawing faces would naturally lead me to observing more. However, this is not what happened. In the ‘imperfection’ of my lines is where I found character, where I found nuances that told my story and reflected my feelings. Had I neatened up the lines, sterilized them, so much information would have been lost.

After some years of doing this, I realized that I was channeling, and that I can choose from where I channel. I draw and paint energy, from myself, from my environment, from people, from my higher self and spiritual guides. As I commit more and more to imperfection, I find my own perfection; I find what is real to me, what my gift to the world is and the language my soul speaks. Had I not committed to imperfection, perhaps I might not have discovered these gifts, but instead allowed the mind to criticize and the heart to ever feel unworthy. The reasoning I gave my mind in order to jump this hurdle and begin this journey in the very beginning, was to tell myself simply: ‘it is better to create something that is imperfect, than not to create at all’.

Made Perfect: what we’re taught vs what is true

Absolute Perfection: re-framing perfection

Meditate Together

Morning Meditation: channeled and grounded personal wisdom into imagery and words

I want to create space
For myself and others to Be
To be peaceful
To feel oneself and learn to reflect
This could be a great service
Connecting oneself back and amazing energy
Between one another
Which then spills over into the rest of the world around us
Fills the collective energy
With positive love and vibes
Moves us, it has the power
To move us, really
This is a great service to the world
To humanity, to ourselves
To community, self embrace, self love
And others around will feel that
This is the movement to begin to start
To follow, execute, to see through
This energy you attract to you
will keep you and others safe
Safe from harm, safe from self harm
Safe from bad thoughts, bad harmful energy
And safely in God’s cradle
Be that light
Which you see and feel in you
And bring it out into the world

Divine Sexuality

I began thinking about sex this morning. I was imagining the way I love to be treated, how my skin likes to be touched, and the kind of connection with other, I desire to have. I love to be seen as a whole, my skin adored, my essence cherished, my heart received and my soul met. I thought about how I don’t like to define my sexuality, because it can’t be defined, but then the term ‘Soul Sexual’ came to mind. I looked it up and found the definition to be; being attracted to a person as a whole, being attracted to a persons soul. While that can be true for me, I don’t feel this definition holds me. It’s not about how I am attracted, but the kind of connection I want. I want meditative, energy rising, body nourishing presence with the divine. But I haven’t fantasized this way in a very long time.

I actually have a ferocious amount of sex energy, so much so that as a teen it annoyed me, as I rarely found myself attracted to people, and I wasn’t taught how to channel it any other ways, I found long boarding a tremendous release for it, an activity both kinetic, sensual and demanding of presence. In 2010-2011 when I chose a year of celibacy, is when I began painting, and now I channel my sex energy into creativity. On the most part I fail to find the kind of sex I want, and rarely find real attraction, I have spent most of my life pushing myself to be interested in others sexually, and at times, unfortunately pushed. My upbringing, society, the examples on TV, and especially toxic ‘boys talk’, made me feel very much obliged to perform in the ways others wanted, or I thought others wanted, and in situation where I’m being sexual, very hard to say no, if my first no is ignored. I find society doesn’t support divine lovemaking, but rather something I see as a kind of ‘fast-food’ mutual masturbation as the most openly prevalent kind of sex, that exists without honour of the other, without honour of the self. Where true intimacy and connection has been confused and replaced in this way. In the past, and in such an environment, I have not know what to ask for nor how to ask for it.

I have experience a lot of sexual abuse in my life, as a late teen and early adult, it was so prevalent that I couldn’t tell the difference between sex and rape. My complaint was that my body was being treated as if there was no soul inside, and how that wounded me so deeply. More and more I was coming to the conclusion that the sex I perceived as available around me, was not the sex I wanted, and no longer worth it to engage in. I began to see it as a ‘what’s the point?’ activity. If only physical, what am I spending my energy on and needing to shower for? Despite how my body might behave and react, I found no real satisfaction in it, and usually, I’d have to ignore the hollowness in my soul that it would leave. Purely physical, for me, is purely pointless. I have experienced love making, the pulling of someone else so close to me that we erupted in physical expression. I have experienced losing myself, opening my eyes with no idea what transpired physically, or even how much time had passed, but feeling deeply touched and satisfied in my being, but these experiences are not the norm for me.

As a young teen I fantasized about the ways I might connect intimately as a person with boys I might love, and fantasized about the kind of lovemaking I desired; the kisses that would touch my skin, the slow and deeply felt caresses that would soak into me, but as the world showed me a different face, I eventually stopped desiring it, as I stopped believing in it. I thought I was shutting down, to not engage in the status quo sex of today, but I’m not, I’m coming back to myself, to the sexual desires of my soul.

For years, since I learned to meditate, as I rise energy in my body, I have felt jolts as the energy hits a block in my body. First it hit the solar plexus but as I healed, the block remained in my heart for a long time. This morning, as I morning dreamed in my bed, of such sensual thoughts, I felt the energy rise and I expected that jolt, but it didn’t come. The energy entered my heart without resistance. In that moment I realized that I no longer feared rape, a wound I’d held for 24 years. I realized I was no longer having ‘negative fantasies’, that were so aggressive I’d have to turn away from, as my mind feared the worst.

Through my healing journey, I am learning that the universe requires contrast to grow. For all my experiences of feeling my soul unrecognized in my body, now I look to opening up to it’s opposite, through thought, movement, painting, taste, nature: life is so sexy! I’m no longer afraid of this immense inner energy, nor threatened by the desires of others. I am ready to embrace myself; body, mind, heart and soul.

I have always loved myself, even when losing connection, it just remained buried, but now I am falling back in love with myself, rediscovering things I’d forgotten, things I adore about my personality; how I make myself laugh, how I do silly little dances to music in my head and randomly sing made-up melodies, the beautiful things about myself, I for a while lost. Life is love and creativity is sex energy flowing up. My sexuality is such that I want to make love to life, as creativity flows, and I adore myself in all my being. Yes, one day I will share this with another, or others, whatever may come. But this is my sexuality; undefined, sensual, kinetic, meditative presence to how sexy life is, in it’s constant creative flow.

I drew this about a year ago, as manifestation art. So the Universe aggressively showed me what I needed to heal to get there. I had drawn this, intending to as two people, divinely margin in lovemaking, but someone else saw this design and told me they felt it was one person, experiencing wholeness.

I include a channeling from a morning meditation. Hiphop, that speaks of the moon, sexual energy and trauma healing:

Heartache

Heartache, something that affects us all, and yet, in today’s world where we are taught to hid feelings that exist outside the ‘neutral spectrum’, so much isolation and loneliness can be found. I spent so much energy trying to fight my heartache, trying to heal it, trying to be ‘alright’, until I learned that I needed to accept where I was, before I could hope to change anything. I needed to stop rejecting where I was on my journey and accept my heartache, accept my heartbreak, accept my loneliness. So much relief came from this space of acceptance, and from this space, I began accepting how much still needed to heal, and I learned to address it without resistance to my experience.

Writing and then singing this song over and over brought me so much comfort as the melody carried my feelings, resonating with where I was, allowing this energy to flow through me, and experiencing the beautiful side of the pain that I felt. I still love this song, it takes me back to those moments, the moments where I sang out of my window, embraced by the music, the expression, the release and acceptance of such beautiful sorrow.

Over the years I’ve learned to create and share my artwork without demanding perfection from myself, as otherwise it blocks my ability to create. I told myself that it’s better to create something imperfect, than not to create at all. However when it comes to sound, I feel like I can only record and release it once, that it needs to be a perfect recording and my voice needs to be it’s best. But I try to throw such ideas to the wind, and treat my music as I treat my visual art. Here I record my music, using a cheap phone, with the waves crashing behind me, shower damp hair, no makeup (as usual) and just a desire to share the song that’s playing on my heart. I wrote this mid 2019.

Expressions such as this, is what heals me and what makes me want to live. A big lie we are told is that creative expressions must have a degree of perfection/beauty/skill to be shared, but as I chase imperfection, I find my own perfection; in my humanity, beauty in emotion, and skill in the ability to express how I feel.

Sunrise

Did you see this morning’s Sunrise?
It was one of those sunrises that makes me feel like, these are the moments we’re living for.
The sun could be seen as it came over the horizon.
I sat on the sand with my guitar and free-styled to my experience.
I went home and with my morning coffee let the sunrise energy pass through me onto canvas with acrylic and UV paint.
Now I have Sunrise energy in my room.

What Is Love?

The first time I remember experiencing love.

I was in the car on my way home after school, wearing my school uniform and looking out of the window and the fields passing. This feeling came to me, I knew it was love; a feeling of ‘being in love’. But then my mind came in and asked, ‘but for WHO are you feeling this love for?’. I thought about the boys at school and thought to myself ‘I don’t even fancy anyone, so I can’t be in love’, and I dismissed the feeling. How sad my education, that as a child I would think that love is only for projecting onto others, and in a romantic way, and yet, I felt it, looking out at nature, and finding presence there. It took me a long, long time to understand that love is a feeling inherent within me, and despite feeling it then, my ‘educated’ mind told me something different.

I spent eight years depressed, most of that time cut from my feelings, and the remaining time in pain. Now that I found my way out of that beautiful darkness, I find presence with myself again. I am remembering how I make myself laugh, because I truly find myself hilarious, how I love being with myself because in the present moments I allow life to flow through me; in creativity, in self care, in silly little dances and songs and natural self entertainment. I understand that rest is important for growth, and simply ‘being’ is the most powerful thing I can ‘do’.

Since coming out of this long dark night, I am laughing again, at things that are funny, and in that laughter, that I had before lost, I know that is self love, not feeling I need to share it with others, but content to share it with myself, and feed everything back into myself, for my own personal growth. I see now how it was my own undoing that has led me back to myself, and with greater understanding, to be able to laugh with myself, to be able to be present with myself, to enjoy the most simple things and moments in life; that is love.

Devil & Liberty

The Devil is coming to take away your liberties, do not fall down before him.
Lady Liberty has your back, use her as fiercely as you can.
She is the weapon to use here.
The Devil is coming but he is lazy and will not try to tear you down, power is in your relinquishment of self and not by his force.
Do not fear child, you are protected, you are loved, keep your frequency.
Do not think that compliance will save you, it will only prove you weak to him.
Strength in numbers, stand up, stand up and don’t ever get on your knees.
We will support you.
Do not fear, do not doubt, do not bow to the Devil.
Open your eye, see the light, know that you will be alright.
You are loved, you are protected, you are important.
Stay true to yourself and have conviction in your Earthly Mission.

Nourishment

No longer alone
But connected and finding growth
Keep following the Sun
And let it nourish you
As you were designed to be nourished

Here At Night

The Moon fuels you, night creature
Take time to bathe in her rays
Sip the cool night air, give praise
Goddess is watching, reaching for you
To connect her wisdom and spirit

Open up, sister, receive me
Allow my womb to encompass you
My light fill you up
We are connected
Love, I am here every night

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Language Of Light

Open open open
To the wisdom that is being spoken
Not in your ear but decantered
Into your mind, third eye
Language of light
Bright
Filtering through
What do they have to say to you?
Be still, don’t worry, the time has come
Your Earthly mission will be done
This transmission
This day will be a day of constantly received wisdom
As you request
Your friend will be joyous
All will follow well
Your session guided
And the right energies will come
For you are choosing to be present
And that is a big gift you bring
Energy exchange will be apt
Take on today with pride and joy
Be confident
This is also your divine path
Be well, use it well
Today, like every day
Is a gift
To you and to all others
Be blessed, be true
Be strong, be soft and wise
Child of God
Spawn of Universe
Reassembled star

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Holding Space

Wisdom isn’t knowledge and sometimes to be effective
It isn’t needed, just presence
Forget what you know or think you know
Remember that we live in a male dominated construct
Where the mind is heavily relied upon
A woman holds space, hollow like the womb
For others to crawl inside and be safe
This deep power, deep deep wisdom and fertile energy
Your capacity to hold space, in reality, is infinite
So you need to move into this energy, frequency, vibration
What you do is powerful and expansive
And people will come to you if you begin to create the right space
And we will guide you, as we have
But now that you’ve finally called on us, your spirit guides
To be more active, here we are, ready to assist you
Hold the space and fill it will people
For you are blessed, rich and true
Open up and we are here to guide you
Open up, dear channel, open up, create space
It’s the most valuable thing you can do

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Yin Rising

Yin is rising
Like compressed air bubbles deep in the sea
She rises and expands
Back to her original size when free

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

The Light Is Here

Fire and water, cosmic elements
Cosmic light and cosmic life
Light years travel on streams of consciousness
To Earth for this time of awakening
Activating light workers, here for the view
Front row seat on this ascension
Birthed world into another dimension
Head filled with light
Energies combine to reactivate power
Mix and swirl the energies twirl
Coming to Earth to renew such pearl
Gods and Goddesses within, time to unfurl
Into the world with cosmic abundance
Gratitude, light and admiration
The light is coming, the height is near
The light is coming, the light is hear
Inside and out, it cocoons and encases
The light is here, I see and feel it already

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Star Seedling

Flower born, a seedling from the stars
Traveled through space, planted next to Mars
Roots in soil, yet mind in outer space
From hell to heaven, this realm to embrace
Heart to follow, our earthly compass
Step out of the flower, don’t want to but must
Delicate like one, sweet, mature
Thrives best when in nature
But duties call, starseeds are hearing
Now pluck the flower you find in the clearing
Duty calls, it’s time to follow
The flower that blossoms in the meadow
Must I be more? I question deeply
I don’t yet know, I guess soon I’ll see

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Cosmic Splash

The Big Bang was a Cosmic Splash of period blood from the Mother Goddess
Carefully pipette she teetered over a vessel
Allowed what stars are made of to flow through her body
It was not a big bang, it was a sweet splash that turned into a ripple and flow
As life travels through space from her womb, she births it, it multiplied and grows
For God is a woman, creator, protector, punisher, giver and grower
She nurtures us to succeed
If the sky were red, it would rain her body
She invites souls through her and births them on Earth
The great alchemy of Pain to Love
The great start gate between realms
Her cosmic heavenly body gives us life

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Together

There we are, isolated and alone together
Trapped in fear of mortality, but who really cares about their real reality
Can the birds fly again, the ants crawl, the fish swim and whales dive
Is humanity listening to the song the birds sing
Are they happy nature is taking a break
Or is narcissism going to be the end of us, of them
We are our own threat, how can that be
Will compassion and introspection rise, will we begin to see
Or will blindness consume again
I can only hope we don’t return to our barbaric ways
And see nature as the home we must respect and care for
For she is more gentle, giving and precious than we
Now is the time to re-examine our actions
And decide the kind of species, our global race, we want to be

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

Jewels Of Life

Allow yourself the things you want, not all must come from within
You may attract what is good and what is wanted in life from the outside
You closed of believing all external is bad and serves only to harm
Or exploit you, or siphon energy, but that simply isn’t true
A;; without is neutral and you have a choice
State what you want, what you really truly want and it will come effortlessly
There is no deserving or non deserving, but if you need to hear and know it
You deeply and wholly deserve to have the things in life you want
Truly you will receive
You don’t need to dredge the darkness forever
Because it feels safe being what you know
Look directly into the light and see what you really want
Admit it to yourself who you truly are and these things will rapidly come
Just because that’s how it is

Free Download of Line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

I Begin With Me

I want space to be, to feel whole
To take an environment that feels right
The world deserves it, but I must begin with me
All of this is for me, for my growth
These words, these images, filling my cup for my own sake
Not just so I can poor onto others
My deep desire to express myself, is just that
To turn inside out and let it all out
The only way to undam this river and let it all flow
Unleash my energy
Allow blockages to quickly erode and dislodge, off they go
This river starts with being for me
I am whole, I am complete, I must let go
Give up and let go
That’s it
All will open after that
And my waves will be unignorable after that
Powerful and Cleansing

Free Download of line Design and Mandala. For self reflection, creativity and meditation through design, colouring and writing; poetry, stories and reflections. For personal use to download and print – enjoy!

The Universe Within

Inside me I feel the whole universe
Inside me I feel I have enough love for the whole world
for the whole universe
I want to open up, like I’m a portal for this energy
for this access, the whole of existence can be found within me
I am not separate but whole connected of and part of it
I am the wardrobe that holds Narnia, I am a star gate
There is no separation, all is one together
I know and feel this
The wisdom and love of the universe is with me
and I want to explode into this realm
I am a portal of love, wisdom and light,
The universe within comes spilling out

Gift To The World

I’m a gift to the world, and I need to believe it
like anyone else, I need to feel it
I’m special, just like all of you
I’m a light grounded on earth
And I’m learning what to do
To spread my gifts, not just stay locked in my room
To know myself, and then make some room
For myself and others, learn to take up space
And invite others in, in a hospitable place
I have love, I’m filled up
I’m over flowing my cup
And I long to share, integrate and wake up
To a life I want to lead, one that is whole
Full of love and hugs, an affectionate goal
I want this, I want that, and now I can say it
Build my self confidence and know that I’ll make it
Learn to soften up, just like a real woman
The goddess within, coming to fruition
That’s the way to complete my earthly mission
The goddess within coming to fruition

Painting for Sale
Acrylic on Canvas 60cm x 80cm

Lift Yourself Up

You’ve graduated, reached the peak
Come out of the darkness, which once was bleak
You’ve proved yourself worthy, of spreading my mission
Of growing a life, full of cognition

You opened yourself up, you did the ground work
So now you get to fly, and I’ll raise you up
This life you are wanting, now that you can see it
Now you believe, touch, taste and feel it

it’s on its way, and I’m so proud
you’ve reached a peak, above the clouds
that kept life foggy, butt you had faith
that you were made for greater and you kept your face

took everything in stride, kept connection alive
Now the life you desire, is building with pride,
You grew your ambition, took on a mission
Hoping and wishing, that your pain had a meaning

What you knew was true, keeping your faith
Now I give to you a life to embrace
You made yourself worthy and opened up
And now from the heavens I will fill your cup

You will be guided with a much stronger hand
Now we know you are strong, and that you understand
You can help many people, shining your light
Take people from terror, transmute their fright,

You know where this leads, a path back into love
What you’ve always desired, Love cosmic above
Hold it in your hands, and channel it from heart
The universe within, just opened up its path

You’re forever welcome, now you know the way
And keep on working on yourself, each and every day
The path will be easier, from now on
Despite anything external, your mission has won

And continues to grow, as you go onto great things
Don’t be shy, the world is listening
Stay true to yourself, loves energy is stronger
Real and enduring, and lasts a lot longer

You’re the alchemist, who turns water to wine
Turns torture to elation, a crushed heart to fine
Love is the answer that you’ve always know,
always wanted, coming back home
Your path is strong, because you built it
Now you’re free and ready, take my hand and live it

Aquatic Womb

We are sea creatures, from where we came
We can return to pray, honoring the sun and the sea each day

Soft like the water, the most powerful force on Earth
Waves her emotions, tsunamis her grief, calm mind she gives life to the deep

We are water creatures, deep sea divers, we have the whole sea of connected emotion
Available to us and as we surrender to it, we can let it flow through us with devotion

We are supposed to know the ocean, waves, lakes, rivers and swamps
All that births life is connected to us, and the moon is the heart that pumps

As a baby swims the minute she is born, from aquatic life in the womb
We hold the wisdom of sea life within us, and the secrets for life to bloom

Water has memory and she remembers us, we remember her, in our cells
The water we drink, wants to dance with her sisters, and return to the sea, to rejoice

What Hell Feels Like

I know what hell feels like, terror to be in your own skin
It’s feeling deep lonely sadness, knowing comfort’s never coming
Heart, Soul and whole being, aching for connection
Learning no one will ever come, to give me human affection

It’s crying in vein, because no one cares
Others taking pleasure, in causing pain and scars
The people supposed to love me, we’re my biggest threat
It twisted my heart, and messed up my mindset

Where my tears comes as pleasure, comfort to my abusers
They’re supposed to love me, it made me very confused and
It’s taking the most cosmic, and spiritual parts of life,
And making them the lowest, twisted, evil parts of life
I have lived in hell, and I experienced true terror
Loneliness, emotional torture, but I chose to get better

I make a choice, I feel with each passing day
I make that choice stronger, with more and more weight
As I go on my journey, into the light
Not to succumb to terror, but to alchemize my fright

From terror to elation, from fear to love
From pain to beauty, from loneliness to whole
What was my curse, is becoming my gift
My ability to understand, myself and others grief

To know the pain in others, to know that I am moving
Towards something greater, from torment onto soothing
To know that from the ashes, of my personal hell,
Who’s fires have now stopped burning, I can rise again and swell

Like the Phoenix rising, mystical with healing energies
From hell take only wisdom, give love back to all my enemies
And know there is forever, distance in between
Where I was and where I’m going, to me heaven is still unseen

But that contrast means I am, to learn heaven on earth
And the longest journey means, the largest capacity for growth
What was once terror, pain, torment, crippling loneliness,
Out of hell I stumbled, these wounds I now address

Now my legs grow strong, I look forward, forward pacing,
Road back to heaven, this journey I’m embracing

I’m coming home, I’m coming home
To a place I know, I’ll be welcome

All the feelings I want, are waiting for me
Love, peace, connection, a place where I can be
Fullness in my heart, love and love, warmth
Acceptance, wholeness, my compass back to north

An integrated person, connection with other people
Where once I was looked down upon, I will be looked to as an equal
Who holds powers of elevation, I will do everything every day
To take me further on my journey, this place I’ll want to stay

Where I know I belong, my journey’s been so alone,
But it doesn’t have to be that way, I’m inviting my sisters
Now that my path is bright, enough for others to join
A place where there is no longer, torture and limitless pain

I am traveling my friends, and I am traveling up
Please join me, this path together, and fill each other’s cup
Let’s find our paths to heaven together, let’s make the road wide
So we can get there faster, hold hands while we glide

We can help one another, on our perspective callings
And if we already pave it, we help others who are crawling
Can learn to skip carefree, the rest of the way
Pull our darkness into light, each and every day

Turning inwards, trusting in myself, connecting with my higher self
Is what saves me, is what still saves me
Self abandon to self acceptance, love and constantly sitting with myself
Through the pain and anguish, that is the way out of hell

Once out of reach, I now embrace myself
I need never forget, what hell feels like

As I look forward to knowing heaven, I rescued my own soul
From the flames this was what I was always supposed to do, to shine a light
Bright enough for others, to know my way back
Into that hell, and illuminate the darkness
And when I’m done Shining my light, my soul will finally rest

Even in hell, I still held onto my light
What others scorned me for, kept me alive through the night

Sisterhood Unite

We are moon creatures
we reflect sunlight
Intuitively we feel the rays,
and flow them like the tide

We take the light
into voids and darkness
Emotional like water
we create the waves

Like the mermaid who lost her voice
when she left the sea
We too have lost our voices,
split from one another

We must come back together again,
and chant again as one,
Pulsate vibe and flow in our
everlasting dance

We are all in need of the same love
we must heal our collective wounds
Connection and in unity
again access nature’s womb

Allow each other to speak,
unblock all of our frights,
Begin to flow and let go,
fly into the nights

Where there is woman, there is life’s connection
and a need to go deeper
She must be reminded of who she really is
she’s everybody’s sister

Hold one another, hug,
comfort and dance,
Be one another’s sister, mother,
daughter and friend

Sync up again and
we will gain back our power.
We were never meant to be alone
this has been our downfall,

We must come back together again
as much as we can,
Take back our sisterhood
and hold each others hand

The burden and pain of segregation
don’t condemn another woman’s aggravation
We all feel the same disconnection
love everyone with equal affection

The burden and pain of segregation
don’t condemn another woman’s aggravation
We all feel the same disconnection
love everyone with equal affection

Sisters, mothers, daughters,
confidants unite,
Embrace and flow together,
and dance into the night
We are wild, we are fierce, we are holding great life
We make the energy flow and in the darkness we bring light

The Channel

Live in devotion to something bigger than yourself
Take on that energy and live with it inside you
It doesn’t really matter, what it is
As long as it brings elation to your truest self

We were made for connection and built to be channels
That is our divine nature, and our purpose
To ground and bind energy, between one another
And the Earth, to receive and give

We were not born into bubbles, we left the dome
Into the world we, became exposed,
from there we are channels, vessels of energy,
The sooner we realize this, the sooner we’ll be free

Everything is energy, and we have a choice
Don’t be led into game you don’t want to play,
Give yourself over to something more divine,
make your own choice on what to channel

Be a vessel for love, creativity and expansion,
of hope, dreams, and desire,
Become a part, of that connection
And know that it will guide you

If you already have something flowing inside,
it’s harder for someone else to control you,
but if you are empty, then others can permeate
take hold with energy and puppet you

be a creator, not a puppet, a vessel for others to abuse,
but a light for the divine to use
be a creator, not a puppet, a vessel for others to abuse,
but a light for the divine to use

We can unconsciously feed and syphon,
circulate and grow the wrong energies,
when we could be channeling growing and feeding
spectacular ones, spectacular ones

You could be a vessel of positive creation
If you feel empty, here’s your path back to elation
Fill you up, and pour it out
in constant conduction
Get off you knees
It’s time for world to dance

Just dance

Absolute Perfection

What do you want, and who are you really
Are you parading in a mask, that makes your soul feel silly
If you existed, in a different time, how would you be different
Act, dress, mannerisms, values and treatment

Find the things that give you joy, that get’s you off the sofa
Allow you to step-away from the mask, and abandon false persona
Who you are beneath, is more lovable and exciting
A person’s better company, than a doll and more inviting

Don’t allow others to place on, projected personality
Create your own and when you’re free, unveil your true reality
Become naked, be seen for who you truly are
then strive, make it happen, and shine like a star

There is no such thing as flaw, but absolute perfection,
design by god, universe, just check on your reflection
by your higher self, and all that guides you
Reach inward for yourself, and the love that vibes you
find your roots so you may fly,
be natural, don’t need to try
look at the earth and look to the sky,
see all and everything as perfect

you are the puzzle piece essential for the gran plan
Return to your true self, true nature, strong Woman
You were made, born and remain perfect, now and forever.
Remove the mask that stops you from breathing better

that makes you sweat, with eye holes to narrow to see clearly,
is that the way you want to live, I mean really?
release yourself in Joy, love n’ self actualisation,
lose old habits, terrors, learned patterns of observation

permeate the world within, and relax into your skin
with your own true beautiful, don’t make a false twin
be the one who knows who she is within
know where you are going, accepts and loves everything

There is no such thing as flaw, but absolute perfection,
design by god, universe, just check on your reflection
by your higher self, and all that guides you
Reach inward for yourself, and the love that vibes you
find your roots so you may fly,
be natural, don’t need to try
look at the earth and look to the sky,
see all and everything as perfect

every moment, every minute, second of your life,
knowing it is valuable, and ultimately, cosmically, perfectly
perfect

Open Up

Behind the scenes, what I am showing you
Making my dreams come true
Since I was a kid
In every way I want to excel, throwing out energy
Like a Duracel
I open up to you, the root of my power
Show how daily efforts are turning me into a flower
Because I love this life, the one I’m learning to build
One day I’ll live free enough to dance in the field
My dream is simple and I’m going to live it
Maximize my strengths, past the reaches of my limits
One up my energy and let my body groove
I’m in the flow of life, it’s not my place to remove
This earthly budding flower, brimming with potential power
Let it grow, let myself go
Maximize myself every hour
Just open up, open up, open up, open up
Just open up, open up, open up, open up
The flower it needs light to grow
Where it can take me, I don’t know
So open up, open up, open up, open up
Open up open up open up open up
Open up open up open up open up

Diving Deep

Deep ocean diving, dredging the swamp, treasures of the deep lagoon
Under water where, one can’t breath, can’t see, frightening water consume
Is where I find my treasures, buried in the silt Wrestle with sea weed
pull these jewels out of the deep
I am deep diving, the darkness inside, Dredging the swamp, for the secrets that I hide

I have this swamp, which could be a beautiful place,
I need to dredge it, one piece at a time,
clean it up, for it could be so beautiful,
it’s an internal space of mine

Instead of being an ugly place to ignore,
it’s become my favorite place to swim and explore
I call it, diving for treasures,
it’s like turning a wound, and making it better

This place could be beautiful, and when cleaner it is,
Therese no need to condemn it, for the state it is in
Before it was a place too raw and ugly to step in
And now it become my place of deep sea diving

The waters are black, dark, just like space
I can’t see below the water until I’m in that place
Before I’d have never gone, because it just held pain
But now it’s the place I go, to see what I can gain

Diving for treasures is what I like to call it
Cleaning up my swamp, until it looks legit
There is beauty locked inside, This watery grave
But as I go dredging, these gems of light I get to save

There’s wisdom in my deep and I’m going deep sea fishing
Each catch I can get helps me further on my mission
Now I see why suffering can be such a gift
Look at all these diamonds I now get to collect

What was once ship wrecked, is floating on the sea
Flying in the sky, now seeing clearly
I’m my own albatross, finding new land
While I dredge the ocean for treasure, with my other hand

The jewels in the deep, no other way could’ve been created
And facing my fears is leaving me elated
Turning terror into gold, if is isn’t alchemy
Turning what was once blind into a vision I can see

Now that I am buoyant I can respectfully
Without scuba gear, explore the deepest parts of me
Now that I am buoyant I can peacefully
Without any fear, explore the deepest parts of me

Reality Duality

The same energy, can be used for good or evil
From power or lack, live in prayer or revengeful
Everyone has the capacity for choice
An internal knowing of which way to use their voice

We are born intuitive, each with a set of skills
Like a video game avatar, the character knows the deal
W are not predispositioned to chose one path or another
That is purely free will my friend, to love our sister and brother

Chose the light or the dark, but know you’ll know them both
Make a choice connected to your heart, and strive for your growth
Only you know your journey, and only you have to live it
The road it is winding, and it will push you to the limit

When do you sleep, when are you awaken,
When do you feel you body and your heart shaken
In the dark is concentrated light
In the light is where the birds take flight
We are not forsaken in knowing duality
For this is the foundation of our reality

Make a choice, stand up for your own voice
But if you’re not heard, in yourself you can rejoice
This life is for the taking, so be who you need to be
Yes be who you need to be, as it’s important to be free

In the dark, we can see the light a lot clearer
I know I am biased, as I’m a light worker
But all is valid, like the valley of death
If we live forever, what about new birth and new breath

Because let’s face it, for there to be reality,
There’s a thing we need that’s called duality
Where there is light there is dark, where there is dark there is light
Where there is a day, it will lead unto the night

When do you sleep, when are you awaken,
When do you feel you body and your heart shaken
In the dark is concentrated light
In the light is where the birds take flight
We are not forsaken in knowing duality
For this is the foundation of our reality

Made Perfect

Return to my own wisdom and begin to clearly see
There is a reason for design, I was constructed carefully
Society has opinions on the way I’m naturally
But as I examine myself I see my reality

I don’t fit in a box, rata-tat two knocks
I have my own design, there’s nothing that is flawed
There is no mistake or flaw to be fixed
I was made perfect for in Gods army to exist

I am short sighted, but-I-have internal clear vision
I am dyslexic, was always bad at revision
Now I realise, I was never meant to be
Swayed by the words of others, Bowing down to my brothers

The system is corrupt and I know we’ve had enough
We are individuals rising, we should lift each other up
Unfold, encourage each individuals gift
Not sit on the conveyer belt needing to be fixed

This life, was made for you and I
Born perfect, just look up to the sky
Wisdom is there, waiting for you to discover
Inside and out, you don’t need to cover
Who you are, because you’re made perfect
Just know your own soul, relax and connect
Only you, can discover your own truth
Learn your own soul while enjoying your youth

As God made us, in his and her own image
So lets explore our individual gifted limits
No-one-else has the right, to label imperfection
When each of us were born with powerful connection

To source, to love, to wisdom of the cosmos
We are one, we are perfect, in ourselves we trust

The system of reward is fixed, You do not need to listen to it
Regurgitation of what is old,, what’s vile, what is being sold
Turning your spirit into sheep, Giving-out rewards while you day sleep
Keep our talents in the deep, While inside we quietly weep
Enough of this gaslighting, I know life can be more inviting
Learning is fun when you can see, Explore yourself intuitively

Not all wisdom is on the book shelf
All you need to know, lies within yourself
Guidance is amazing if it’s in your best interest
But you don’t have to be a zombie in this circus

This life, was made for you and I
Born perfect, just look up to the sky
Wisdom is there, waiting for you to discover
Inside and out, you don’t need to cover
Who you are, because you’re made perfect
Just know your own soul, then relax and connect
Only you, can discover your own truth
Learn your own soul while you enjoy your youth

Regurgitation is not wisdom
It’s clouding our natural vision
Please Make your own decision
On the life you want you lead
Bust out of this cosmic prison
Reconnect your intuition
Bring your talents to fruition
That’s your way to succeed

This life, was made for you and I
Born perfect, just look up to the sky
Wisdom is there, waiting for you to discover
Inside and out, you don’t need to cover
Who you are, because you’re made perfect
Just know your own soul, relax and connect
Only you, can discover your own truth
Learn your own soul while you enjoy your youth

Life Divine

The life you want to lead is within your grasp
Stand firm and stay steady, on your own path
Just need to know the details, get more specific
And what you want is coming, so take action every minute

Keep praying ‘cause what you ask for is real
Keep manifesting daily, ‘cos you know the deal
You have a contract with God and you’re going to fill it
Knowing your dreams and then you’re going to live it

Because love is waiting just round the corner
It is growing, it will just get broader
in every way you can imagine
Just do your best every day to live a life of passion
You don’t need to try, just open up your mind
You’re energy too, and before you know, you’ll live a life Divine

Inspiring others, as you’ve always wanted
The reason you felt tragedy when you were a kid
You guessed it already, at first that you would suffer
Karma clearing, know some learning and then you’re free to prosper

A good life awaits, the one you want to lead
In every action of every day, this vision you must feed
Don’t worry, things can change, as you expand get bigger
Become the person you’re supposed to be, a natural leader

Because love is waiting just round the corner in every way you can imagine
Just do your best every day to live a life full of passion
You don’t need to try, just open up your mind
You’re energy too, and before you know, you’ll live a life Divine

You can feel it in your bones, you no longer need to hide
Catch yourself in the mirror and you can feel much pride
Let your gifts radiate, out for all to see
Turn your lonely path from an ‘I’ into a ‘We’

Because love is waiting just round the corner in every way you can imagine
Just do your best every day to live a life full of passion
You don’t need to try, just open up your mind
You’re energy too, and before you know, you’ll live a life Divine

Cosmic Sunflower

The flower in the sky
Opening up my mind
Giving new meaning to the name sunflower
This cosmic attitude
Gets me in the mood
Takes me to the place where I can embrace my true power

I can trace back to the day
When I began to start this
In my mind I saw a daisy
Crown chakra cosmic bliss

From that moment on
Something had opened up
From below up to the top
My eyes open shut

The visions before me
Into sketchbook I would capture
Connected to Ajna power
Turned it on like a shower

These cosmic visions flowing free
Getting stronger each day
Until I could plainly see
Didn’t need to meditate

On the odd occasion
On the outskirts of my ear
I guess from out of space
Cosmic music I could hear

I never knew the purpose
Of all these spacely visions
How to use it, what to do
Without external guidance

And so I spent ten years
Pondering the thought
I began to understand
The power of being self taught

Now I have a choice
On how to use my voice
Be true to my self
In my own music I rejoice

The flower in the sky
Opening up my mind
Giving new meaning to the name sunflower
This cosmic attitude
Gets me in the mood
Takes me to the place where I can embrace my true power

The flower in the sky
Opening up my mind
Giving new meaning to the name sunflower
This cosmic attitude
Gets me in the mood
Takes me to the place where I can embrace my true power

Now I mould my own road
And lay it out before me
I rarely know my next step
Stay true to personality

Only I need to walk
And in the way I so desire
Turn my passion on
Ignite my internal fire

I’ll skip along each step
That takes me closer to source
The place we all call home
This journey I indorse

I catch glimpses of the truth
And deliver it the way I choose
Grounding the light
Is the best thing I can do

I was told in a tent
And read it many times since
Ground the light in any way
It’s what my name means

Dance, or draw or write a poem
Anything to get it flowing
Light grounder, paint a flower
Bask in this cosmic power

For what I will draw next
choose colours that fit best
Opening my mind
Let my pencil do the rest

Coming into my own
Taking my throne
Every day I take a step
On the road back home

The flower in the sky
Opening up my mind
Giving new meaning to the name sunflower
This cosmic attitude
Gets me in the mood
Takes me to the place where I can embrace my true power


https://youtu.be/ammKviZ7p54

Rings Of Infinity

Sitting in the rings of infinity
No longer enjoying anonymity
A want to be heard, hear my heart ignite
The worries I’ve had, crossing through the night

Alone, one tone, too close to the bone
In my cave, being brave, nowhere to call home
Self made, that’s my legacy
My mother did it, now it’s time for me

Stronger alone, at least that’s what I thought
Served me for a while, now it’s time for my heart to thaw
Looking to the stars and feeling no shame
This journey I’m on, isn’t about blame

But expansion, of internal microcosm
My garden inside is where I first should blossom
Though feeling alone, I found a whole person
Now I have no doubt that this journey is awesome

And the stars, were always guiding my way
A hundred billion suns, in the absence of the day
In my art and meditation, I found a way to pray
Sculpting my life, out of cosmic clay

I might be small, but wisdom doesn’t impose
Doesn’t have size, it doesn’t even wear clothes
I’m flowing the light, from my heart unto my brain.
the sky squeezing out infinite cosmic rain

It is healing, splashing over my body
Yes I want this, now I believe I am worthy
With the cosmos, yeah I want to go steady
Make my commitments, now I know I am ready

My mind clear, where I will go on this journey
Releasing fear, reverse my dichotomy
truth is near, living always inside me
I’ve got my sketchbook, and I’m doodling happily

Now I can breath, fresh air in the breeze
Caught in a sneeze, Big Bang release please
All is clear, in my my world of cosmic growth,
Self love is the feeling I want to grow the most

And the start, were always guiding my way
A hundred billion suns, in the absence of the day
In my art and meditation, I found my way to pray
Sculpting my life, out of cosmic clay

Root Of Power

The root of your power, sits at your base
Deep with your fingers, you need to face
Deep in your pleasure, is your good place
Touching yourself, touching your grace

Moon is the Witch, deep in the night
Fire in your belly, time to ignite
Be gone with the terror, causing your fright
Step over the corpse, back into the light

Touching the moon, where she is bright
Her power within, her power take flight
Seat of my wisdom, seat of my throne
Caressing my nature, ‘til terror is gone

Howl to the Moon, my call she has known
The Queen of the night, back on her throne
The Queen of the night, back on her throne
Caress my true nature, ‘til healing is done

Memories lost, memories gone
Terror subsides, while I’m on my throne
Bask in self love, vibrate in my dome
My vessel filled up, with energies known

Manifesting power, I use it to heal
While through my lips, a pleasuring squeal
I use this energy, for me to heal
My body with nature, I know it feels real

Legs in the air, I part both my heal
Tilted to nature, my lips back I peel
Yonie to god, this trauma I heal
Yonie to god, this healing is real

This power inside, I thought I could hide
Letting it rest, but it stirs inside
Creative it pours, its part of the flow
Manifest reality, let this block go

Into the river, my energy pore
Fill up my vessel, vibrating once more
Fill up my vessel, for I am a queen
Circulate energy and hear me scream

Sit on my throne, sit where I please
Roll on my back or squat on my knees
Touching myself, in my blooming flower
The root of my soul, the base of my power

The root of my soul, the base of my power
Touching myself, in my blooming flower
Touching myself, in my blooming flower
The root of my soul, the base of my power

Roots And Fruits

We choose to leave buried that which is the darkest.The unmet unconsciousness
Below and above are the same, with equal value
Just like a tree could not survive with its roots above the earth, neither could the ego.
Feeding off the dark, the dead, the absence of light.
Both that duality is needed to grow, to expand.
When a tree is cut, only the top part is taken, the roots left to die in the dark
But it isn’t right to take a tree, just like it isn’t right to take only the light in a person.
All is valuable, all must be accepted, in the self and others. For what is underground was born of the light.
Make sure the unconscious mind is ripe, fruit bearing, healthy, nourishing bass, though in the dark, under soil, it is the foundation on which the tree grows. Have good roots, a healthy unconscious mind, so you can provide shade, clean air, shelter for animals, all the clear and beautiful gives and gifts you have to offer just by being yourself.

Evil Exposed

Evil is powerlessness, that’s why when you face it, it crumbles, that’s why it lurks in the shadows, because even a mouse can look like a monster. Evil is powerlessness incarnating, taking hold in fear, desperation, desolation, disconnection, a need for greed, for more, for external bandaid, a filling of a hole, void, grotesque wounds left to fester, energy lost, allowed to scatter, playful energy in the wrong place.
Evil is not kind to the self, it is self punishing and then projecting. Evil hurts everyone around, evil is so sad, so lonely, so desolate and desperate for company, for connection, for love, but does not believe itself worthy, it is not worthy in the form it holds, seeking company in pain, thrill in pain, connection in the pain of others, power in inflicting, just to have an effect. Evil is powerlessness incarnate.
So turn on the light, expose it, show it to itself, it will squirm and cower and won’t believe in itself, won’t acknowledge it’s reflection, evil possesses but it has no life of it’s own, sad and lonely evil.
Sorry for your sadness, sorry for such isolating, that you feel such pain. Evil is not to be tormented, scorned, cast out, denied, separated or feared. Evil is asked, where do you pain? Where do you hurt, show me, let me bring the light in and see you. Most light cannot reach such darkness, but if you keep light percent with you always, evil cannot trap you, stay with you, or enter your life. Evil seeks the darkest places, and light shines first on mountain tops. Evil is low, in depth, it hides down deep, away from light, away from consciousness. That is why awareness, light and self searching is so powerful and needed. If you see evil, within you or within others, offer your light, offer your light in any and every circumstance, for light is what the world needs, always and everywhere. Evil is unconsciousness, light is consciousness, only one will stand true in the end. Light to every corner nook and cranny of the world, and evil will no longer be recognised as the entity that it is today, it will be understood as the deepest darkest most tormented twisted child, that needs to find its way home, for a bath and a cuddle, and a cry and some love. Evil will feel sorry for all that it has done, once it feels and can accept warmth and light that it so deeply darkly craves.
Evil needs to be scary to protect itself, to create the illusion of safety, the illusion of power, to make itself safe. Just a little light can help, don’t play evils games, don’t get drawn down or sucked in, evil is just desperately trying to survive. Evil is not power or powerful, evil is powerlessness. Evil prays on the strong masquerading as weak, feeding of distorted and contorted light because it cannon receive it direct. Evil is powerlessness. If evil tries for you, it is because you are full of light, you don’t ever need to let it. If evil follows you, don’t run and hide, turn up your light, turn up your light, evil won’t dare to venture where it is bright.
Evil is but a projection of powerlessness on the wall, it looks big, but it is small.

Vibrant Vessel

Your body is but a vessel
Filled up and animated by you
An intelligent vessel
Filled with intelligent energy
Full of systems
Brimming with internal wisdom
Of function, survival and self healing
Listen to the body if healing is what you want
Allow it to come alive with your energy of consciousness
Speak to it and let it speak back
Your vessel, your temple, your home of soul
Decorate it, move in, feel proud to live here

The Field

When the heart and mind become one
In circular within the body field
Then you will find the seat of the soul
Cohesion of feeling
Manifesting power
If rooted in the Earth
In the Earth is where your energy will ground
Come to fruition
And the life you seek
Will come into existence

Catch A Starflake On Your Tongue

Let go, open up
Catch a Star flake on your tongue
It is easy when you know how
To relax and let the Universe take you
Your mind floats away
Your body dissolves into pulsating energy
I know you can feel it
I know you know the feeling
You are exactly were you’re meant to be
In every aspect of life, healing, growth, path
You are Claire, you are light
You know your name meaning
As you step into your full power
Just relax into it
And catch a Star flake on your tongue
Let the mind go, let the body go
And catch a Star flake on your tongue

Sacred Flow

That which brings forth love and life always brings forth love and life
The red flow of life
Nutrient rich, life giving to soil, spread on crops to reinvigorate life
Nutrients of love straight from your body, return to the soil before your death
Natures gift to woman, woman’s gift to nature
She is in circular flow as she gives back her body every month
She is the life giver, she is of love and life
She gives her body every month and returns to nature her wisdom she collects
This is natures gift to her, she is natures gift
This is her gift back to nature
In constant cycles of flow
Release your trauma if you are in pain, this is her cleansing gift
Of soft vibration, extreme relaxation, release of what is old and unwanted, unneeded
Relax and feel the heartbeat of nature returning to the earth, claiming what is hers
Collect this sacred fluid and return her body to the EarthWhile she is alive, while she is alive, return her body to the Earth
This is the highest gift of a woman, to return herself to the Earth, before she is dead, while vibrant inside
She is a constant cycle of love and life, purity and light

She is always there, always guiding, always watching, the cosmic goddess spirit, still alive within us, guiding us, awakening us. Take notice of her, her power that flows through you, that you are a part of, this collective sisterhood, this collective terror you cleanse, and wisdom that you ignite, witches are found in the dark because they hold such light, howling at the moon before they take flight, this power scared men, and so began the fight, but the war is over, it’s time again to embrace every shadow and every ball of light, merge them, reveal what is waiting, your powers within, your powerhouse yonie, your sacred wisdom within.

Speak Direct

Don’t be all a flutter with your words
Disguised as kindness, caught up embarrassed
Speak direct in truth and earnest
And know you can be heard

Don’t beat around the bush
Talk in riddles or meander the issue
It doesn’t feel right
It is not fully honest

There are ways to express
And tell your truth
That can be kind
That can be considerate
That can be compassionate
To others
And more importantly
To yourself

Any thing unsaid you wish to say
Can get stuck and block you
Open yourself up as a channel
Speaker of your own truth
Respect your own words
And so others can follow

Speak to be understood
Not in riddles with sequinned meanings
Intertwined and underlined
Be direct
Be earnest
Be kind
Be truthful
Learn this skill
It may become the most valuable one you come to poses

Manage your thoughts
Make them clear
Know your feelings
Make them clear
Understand the position of the other
Then be clear

Mental Discipline

Don’t get distracted by unimportant things
Some are just parasites dominating your mind
See that they are small, and that you busy
Pay no attention to such things
And see you are a giant
And know that you can strive away
From such petty minds
Be the dominant character
In your own story always
Remember you are not the dominant factor
In anybody else’s either
You don’t have to take that burden
Be true to yourself and know your path
It’s just the Devil taunting your way
With few tools left to deploy
Not everyone is on your side
Let them buzz off to the sidelines
And let their buzzing fade away

Confessions Of A Skeleton

Walking the earth feeling like Death
The fall from Heaven broke my bones
Living without skin is so painful

Lashing out for the tears no one can see
Expected to function as if I am whole
With no one to hold and nowhere to go

I am still me, but my shell an illusion
Just brittle bones walking in painful confusion
I look like a monster but I’m just a baby
What I need is tenderness and integration
Ointment my joints where I feel inflammation
I’m not a shell I am only bones

My shell an illusion, somewhere I am whole
Just disconnected and so I lash out
I know I’m not wicked, just in pain so strong
Where do I belong when in company of demons
Of mine and of others, I’m in pain so strong

I just want to find a place I belong
A place to call home, a warm place within
A heart that beats that I can call my own
I’ve lost it, it’s gone, and so I don’t feel home
Can’t anybody see this pain for so long

My skin it was stolen, lost long ago
And now on the Earth feeling vulnerable and alone
I am just bones, where did my skin go
I’m all alone, doesn’t anybody know
I’m lost without my home, must I remain alone
Have kindness please, I can’t find my home

Know Your Own Truth

You know your own truth and you don’t have to prove it
Your wisdom is yours, it’s not for others to challenge
Those that do are simply weak in themselves
Not to respect yours, needing to impose theirs

If you know your own truth and shine your own light
You wont have the need to convince others
Your own self-conviction is enough to influence
Others to know their own truth
And walk confidently in their own light
And that is the best thing you could ever want
For another human being

Contentment needs no comment on others

With diminishing passing comments
Know yourself, protect what’s yours
And hold yourself in the truth of your own light
Don’t be influenced, stay true only to yourself
It is the weak who try to influence the strong

It is not loving energy, but the voiced need of the ego
For control of ones environment
And a need to believe that which one isn’t fully convinced of
If living your own truth can’t be handled by others
Move away, step back, keep yourself in tact

Challenge yourself by the words others speak
And if those words are found false, know yourself all the deeper
In that way you live without resistance, but in gentle, self guided flow
While your mind and heart remain yours

A New Place To Be

Above and in the clouds
A new place to be sits
Supported by love
Defies what we know
But true to what we don’t
The elements support it
Cosmic energy fuels it
Rain drip drip drips
Back down to Earth
With the energy and wisdom
It’s collected from this
Vibrating, pulsating place

I Love And Accept You

Love your demons, they are the part of you that you rejected and disowned, created fear over, let fester and grow, like a strong bacteria multiplying in the dark.
Dry it out in the warmth and light of your love.
Shine on it, turn on your spotlight and tunnel vision, zoom in and see; you don’t need to fear yourself.
You need to love every inch, atom and energetic vibration within yourself, because every single part of you demands, deserves and requires respect and love.
Love yourself truly, to the depth of your darkness and heights of your light, love yourself and you and your world will transform.
All the demon wants, like you, is love. It is the part of you, you reject and deem unlovable and fear. Can you imagine how that feels? This is what you do to yourself; you created this demon to protect yourself, now you must take your demons back.
It’s the part of yourself others rejected and so you rejected, made an enemy of that part of yourself, but it is you.
If you want self-love and acceptance, then all demons must be loved and integrated and taken back as a beautiful part of you.

The Founder Of Light

The founder of light
The holder of records
Burning bright
Fuel gifted daily
Still burns in the night
Only we can’t see
Acknowledge his wisdom
Burning for wee
Burning constantly
The birds in the sky
The wisdom he brings
All life on earth
In the morning flight sings

Enough and Worthy

I felt caught in negative energy, dark thoughts came into my mind, self-deprecating, self-harmful. Thought’s I’d had in the past, that I thought had left me, returning to taunt me. But they didn’t make me feel as bad as they would have in the past, because I didn’t find them as convincing as I once did. My mind told me I was back where I started, that I hadn’t made any progress. But then I looked at my life and took just one area where I undoubtedly had changed a lot, and that was enough to contradict these thoughts. But the feelings stayed with me.

I decided to do some video editing as it had made me feel so good earlier. I had just about completed a video that I was really proud of, ‘some of my best work’, I’d told myself earlier that day when still feeling good, and so when saving it, I accidentally deleted the progress I’d done and the original file, meaning all the work was lost. It made sense. I’d created something that boosted my self worth beyond expectation, and while holding that energy of lack of worth, I managed to delete it. However, I was surprised not to feel upset. Despite it having taken me hours to create intuitively, I decided to get to work, slowly, recreating what I had made. Because I also believed I could do it again.

I took a moment to meditate and searched inside myself, I felt unworthy. I felt where that feeling manifested, and it was in my hips, as if wearing a yellow shame filled pad on each hip, under my skin. I remember years ago, a healer telling me we hold our sense of self worth all around the hips and lower belly, in conjunction with our lower chakras that form our base. In my meditation I decided to go into the past to search for some origin of feeling unworthy, and some memories of being bullied and put down at school came to mind from when I was young. I asked myself to remember a time when those same people who bullied me, also benefited from me being around. I recalled a school day trip to an adventure park. I can’t remember exactly the activity, but we took it in turns to climb up a tree, walk along a log, high off the ground, to it’s middle and climb down something. I watched my classmates go up a little apprehensively, and when it came time to walk the log, they were scared, sheepish and worried about falling. I half grew up on a farm, I spent much of my childhood climbing and playing in trees, and so I went up with confidence. When I got to the log, I confidently walked across as if it were nothing, I felt I could walk the whole thing and really show off, but I didn’t, I just completed the task effortlessly. After that, each classmate after me went up with increased confidence, laughing and smiling and showing off and not a single person was scared. I had showed them that it was possible, but also, in my meditation I realized, they felt they could do it because they saw me as inferior, they had mentally positioned me below them, and therefore, if I could do it, they could do it better, I believe that was their belief.

After this memory I told myself, by virtue that they put me down to elevate themselves, when I, even in a disempowered state, would be active in elevating others, is enough for me to believe I am no less worthy. As an empath and natural healer and inspirer, it is in my energy to elevate others, however, I was in a disempowered state, so it was natural for these kids to use my energy to elevate themselves, it’s almost like the flip side of the coin. Knowing my truth and self worth, I can see that I was never unworthy, I was simply disempowered, and thus I was mentally able to reframe my experiences for disempowering, to now empowering. Instead of these past experiences contradicting any thoughts of relevance and worthiness I might have, now these memories can actually back them up. I believe it is within our perceived biggest weaknesses, those that others taunt us for, our biggest differences, the reasons we ‘didn’t fit in’ and are most shamed for, are actually where our biggest strengths can be found.

The Mountains

The mountains, the mountains

I close my eyes and dream

Above the clouds is a special place

I know I long to be

The mountains, the mountains

The further up I go

Above the clouds to sit and feel

New things I come to know

It’s where I want to rest

It’s where my soul calls home

Above the clouds where the sun rises

Solitude is never alone

Morning Meditations

Recently, each morning I have taken to meditating and then free flow drawing directly after, and writing an accompanying poem. Each poem and design relate to something in my reality that is happening, be it direct growth, conflict, events or conversation. I’m creating these art, poem memes and intend to go on sharing these here daily.

Jiving To Musicians

Latest FaceConscious vlog featuring live paintings at Hanoi Rock City in Hanoi, and at the X-mas Block Party painting to the bands Tiny Giant, Monoheart and Limebócx. Showing my designs created throughout the past week, with activities for the upcoming Art Battle, first in Hanoi which I will be taking part in and a new rap I wrote. Check out my designs, paintings, poetry and rap: click here!

Dispelling Poison vlog 6-7

For some time I had been feeling awful and I came to the root of my problem, someone in my life was toxic. In Vlog 6 I talk about coming to the painful decision of cutting my mother from my life. In Vlog 7 I talk about the after effect this has had on my life.

Please enjoy the line designs featured in these vlogs as free downloads, for you to colour and reflect in (for personal use only).

Download – Vlog 5

Download – Vlog 5

I’m experimenting with different layouts for these designs, feedback welcomed 🙂

Enjoy my designs from the past few days.

For insight into these wacky faces and some nonsensical poetry, check out Vlog 5

Check out as well Instagram and Facebook pages for more designs and the colourful, arty things I get up to!

Feel free to share what you create and tag FaceConscious! 😀

Download 2 (vlog 3-4)

My designs over the past few days as I enjoyed a comedy show and multiple live music performances. Please enjoy these designs and if you’d like insight as to why I created them, check out my vlogs for these designs:

Vlog 3 – Feeling Feelings

Vlog 4 – Designs

Free Download 2

Free Download

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Please enjoy this free download. I offer these designs for personal use only, a collection of 14 designs created in the past week.

Free FaceConscious Download

You may use these in several ways. Print them as posters, colour them in for relaxation, or, another way is to use these as a reflective tool. Any creative way that inspires you, and here are some simple suggestions:

  • Simply observe the images and be aware of what memories, thoughts or feelings they evoke in you. Some might have a strong effect on you, and others may have none at all.
  • Give the images your own titles based on your reflection.
  • Us the images as inspiration to write poetry, or a story about the character you see before you.
  • Add lines and draw in perspective, details and background. Reflect on what you have drawn.
  • Allow yourself to colour in the image, and add any details you like, and allow your subconscious to pick the colours. After reflect upon the colours you chose, and the way you used them. Whatever the colour feels to you, that is their meaning for you in that moment.
  • Use the images fro inspiration to create a completely new piece of artwork.
  • Make a collage.

Allow the designs and the way you choose to modify them, or not, give you introspection. Ask yourself what you see and feel. This should be a relaxing experience and there is no need to force anything. It can also be powerful to be and feel heard. This is an amazing way of communicating and it can be just as powerful to share with others around you. If you would like to share what you create, I have created a Facebook group FaceConscious Fun for just that. Personally I would LOVE to see why you create or take from this. If you choose to post and share what you create from these, please please tag or hashtag FaceConscious to give credit and spread the word. Thanks so much and enjoy!

To know more about the meaning behind each design and to hear accompanying poetry, please check out my YouTube channel as I start my first Vlog, covering my designs, poetry, feelings and creative endeavors: click here.

A New Style 2

I had a burst of obsession over creating these new designs and made these over just a few days, staying up for dawns, hunched over my ipad. Enjoy…

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A New Style

I began creating FaceConscious doodles over two years ago, and one reason was to improve my ability to draw faces and expressions. I was recently taken over by the obsession of drawing from photographs, drawing around the image and then redrawing the lines over again, exaggerating each time to create over the top expressions. This is a great exercise for learning more about face shapes, expressions and colours, which I lift from the photograph.

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